A Careful step forward
I'm sitting at home and my mind is working overtime, like a ping pong ball bouncing up and down. On the peak of bad luck I very carefully dream a bit about a happy future, suddenly realising how lucky I am. Continuously analysing I now try to get to the bottom of my feelings.
I start to ask myself questions;
- Where do I stand at the moment?
- How bad or good is my situation?
- What do I fear the most?
- What do I hate?
- What do I value most in life?
- What is my final goal?
- What do I Love?
I force myself to answer all of these questions in an objective mode although I suspect that my feelings will win as usual. My emotional life at the moment is upside down and the drive to use anger and sadness in an excessive way is tempting. I feel the need to repair my break to control my emotions. At the same time I know that these feelings are valuable to me, forming a base of my objective mind. Do I feel this experience as a growth in wisdom? If I gain in the end out of my own misery, why should I push it away? Maybe I am a person that attracts it. Because wisdom for me is the most valuable life experience I feel grateful to have this opportunity.
Black and white, day and night, disorder and order, good or bad these are all antithesis we need in life to compare our state of mind and feelings. Our own way of handling and reacting to situations will make something good or bad. We decide the feeling or reaction... suddenly I know I have more control than I am aware of. Why do I feel out of control?
If I think something is valuable I will put energy into attracting this even when it means my emotions will be affected. So eventually, as we all know, problems are created by us, no one else.
And the ball has stopped bouncing...
Caroline Hofstede
2001
Caroline is the founder of Cosmic Sparkle, a place for healing inspiration. "Sharing on the world wide web is an extremely powerful tool, it is my aim is to inspire others to become aware of the healing sparkle that is present within us all".